What is your favorite food? Ham cheese jelly sandwich
What do you hope you never have to eat again? broccoli
What’s your favorite thing about school? You get to learn a
lot of stuff and in preschool you get to do a lot of fun stuff and you know
what I really want to eat? Fried suction cup tentacles.
What makes you happiest? Because you. You’re beautiful and I
What is one new thing you’d like to try this year? I wanna
try wearing underwear in the middle of the night for the first day. Can I wear
the same underwear tonight? Cause they’re not dirty.
What would you like to be when you grow up? A fire farter
man. Where they put out fires they fart all day. Actually I wanna be a farter
man. Where you fart all day, like loud farts and you pee in the toilet all day
long and poop on a rock like a dog in the backyard. Actually not peeing and
pooping. Just farting.
Why do you like being a kid? Because it’s fun.
What kind of fun? Blending in fun.
One word to describe you would be? My eyeballs. They can’t
see that far.
What advice would you give your parents? To go outside and
ride Wingnut and hold on to her collar.
What would make them as parents better? I could jump on your
What do you like to do for fun? Bouncing bouncy balls.
What was the nicest thing you did for someone? Giving them
their breakfast. But that would be weird. I once, well, giving them fried
dinosaur leg or something.
If you could be any animal, which one would you be and why? A
kangaroo because you get to ride in Mommy kangaroo’s pouch.
What is your favorite memory so far? A kangaroo.
Who is your favorite aunt? Sugar ants! Because they clean up
your cars and they clean up your houses. They put things away.
Of All the things I can do, I am best at… farting at people’s
If I could stay up late on a school night I would …. watch Ninjago
Favorite candy? Smarties
Who do you look up to? You
What do you think you will be doing 10 years from now? When
I grow up and get in college? I’m gonna get a phone. And then I’m gonna call
you and I’m gonna tell my Daddy how happy I am that I’m in college and then I’ll
get kids and sons.
What do you want to do as a career? Protecting the planet
with my machine gun, like shooting earth’s best deadly predators. Like aliens
and stuff. I’m gonna be somebody who KILLS monsters.
Favorite color? Red
Favorite subject? (I didn't ask. Kid is not in school.)
Favorite song? I’m Sexy And I Know It
Favorite book? Elephant and Piggie
Favorite sport? Swimming
Favorite Drink? Ruby beer
Favorite Ice Cream? Vanilla
Favorite Game? Gunstringer … except I can’t play it. I don’t
Favorite Flower? Orchids, they’re magical.
Favorite Restaurant? The one with the good, good dumplings.
Favorite Store? The Giant with the scanners!