I threw a birthday party today for a bunch of little kids. Thank goodness the weather cleared up and allowed us to hold it in the park after all. And I wonder: is there any person more self-centered than a 5-year-old boy? I think not. He spent his time leading up to the party asking me what he would get from his friends, and then asking his friends and their parents what they were bringing him. Is it possible to raise a middle-class child without a sense of entitlement these days? I swear I don't give him every single thing he asks for--and yet, he thinks the world revolves around him.
New plan: introduce boy to the idea that lots and lots of people have nothing, not clothes or toys or shoes or houses or food. I have brought this up from time to time, but I'm pretty sure the boy thinks I invent lies with which to torture him. Like that time I told him he would be unable to see a T-Rex because they're extinct.
I am so tired.
Other news of the less repetitive kind (because ya'll are tired of hearing me say I'm tired, I know it): I convinced the local university that they want to study my son. I've written here about the struggles we've had with the child, about how he can never quite behave like the other kids, how frustrating he is, and how crazy he can make us all (see the "My Difficult Child" section of the archives). I have wondered what the hell I'm doing wrong, what's wrong with my kid, and what I'm going to do about it. I've dismissed things as "a phase", or decided that maybe this is how all boys behave.
But the truth is, this isn't working. I've bought a library's worth of books and spent hours and hours talking over his behavior endlessly with anyone who will listen. I've become obsessive about watching how other kids behave in the situations that send my son into a tailspin, hoping to find an answer, or at least a clue. I want someone to tell me he's normal, that he will grow out of this, and that I am not crazy. I've even sought the help of a licensed clinical social worker--who has turned out to be basically useless. My mommy sense tells me that something else is going on here, but I have failed, so far, to put my finger on it.
Enter the university. The Child Psychology Lab is doing a study on children who are either diagnosed with or showing the markers of ADHD. They will pay me to bring my kid in for an evaluation, and if he meets their criteria, we get free parent-child interaction therapy. This is awesome on many levels, not the least of which is that my insurance will not cover this kind of comprehensive assessment and it's REALLY DAMN EXPENSIVE to pay for it out of pocket. Also awesome is that this isn't a drug study--it's a study of a play-based therapy I can do with my child every day, myself, at my house.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Our first appointment is May 5th.
good for you!
let me know how it goes cuz were on the same path!
Posted by: morgan | April 14, 2008 at 10:09 PM